A is for apple, and B is for boat,

That used to be right, but now it won't float!

Age before beauty is what we once said,But let's be a bit more realistic instead.

Now

The Alphabet:

A's for arthritis;

B's the bad back,

C's the chest pains, Perhaps car-d-iac?

D is for dental decay and decline,

E is for eyesight, can't read that top line!

F is for fissures and fluid retention

G is for gas which I'd rather not mention.

H High blood pressure--I'd rather it low

I For incisions with scars you can show.

J is for joints, out of socket, won't mend,

K is for knees that crack when they bend.

L for libido, what happened to sex?

M is for memory, I forget what comes next.

N is neuralgia, in nerves way down low

O is for osteo, bones that don't grow!

P for prescriptions, I have quite a few,Just give me a pill, I'll be good as new!

Q is for queasy, is it fatal or flu?

R is for reflux, one meal turns to two.

S is for sleepless nights, counting my fears,

T is for Tintinitus, bells in my ears!

U is for urinary, troubles with flow;

V for vertigo, that's 'dizzy', you know.

W for worry, NOW what's going 'round?

X is for X ray, and what might be found.

Y for another year I'm left here behind,

Z is for zest I still have-- in my mind.

I've survived all the symptoms, my body's deployed, And I'm keeping twenty-six doctors fully employed!!!

HAVE A GREAT DAY !