As a bagpiper, I play many gigs. Recently I was asked by a funeral director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man. He had no family or friends, so the service was to be at a pauper's cemetery in the Kentucky back country. As I was not familiar with the backwoods, I got lost and, being a typical man, I didn't stop for directions.


I finally arrived an hour late and saw the funeral guy had evidently gone and the hearse was nowhere in sight. There were only the diggers and crew left and they were eating lunch. I felt badly and apologized to the men for being late. I went to the side of the grave and looked down and the vault lid was already in place. I didn't know what else to do, so I started to play.


The workers put down their lunches and began to gather around. I played out my heart and soul for this man with no family and friends. I played like I've never played before for this homeless man. And as I played 'Amazing Grace,' the workers began to weep. They wept, I wept, we all wept together.


When I finished I packed up my bagpipes and started for my car. Though my head hung low, my heart was full. As I
opened the door to my car, I heard one of the workers say, "I aint never seen nothin' like that fore and I been putting in septic tanks for twenty years."




Apparently I'm still lost....

Two men are cleaning out a septic system.
One hung his jacket in a tree, and the wind caught it and blew it into the septic.
He immediately grabbed a pole and began to try to fish the jacket out.
"Good jacket?" asked his co-worker?
"Not really, but my lunch is in the pocket"